Composting Bad Guys with Chuck Norris:
Since nothing gets past Chuck Norris, he was well aware of the Season 6 villains’ plans. The morning that they arrived, they found Chuc laboriously watering his mother’s flowers with his back turned to them. As they crept in for the kill, Chuc
was able to swiftly roundhouse kick two of them and send them sailing into a rain barrel! The remaining four stood stunned in disbelief until they were knocked to the ground by Chuc
’s iron fist and knee. One managed to back flip back onto his feet, but not for long for Chuc
wouldn’t allow it. In a graceful, Matrix-like fashion, Chuc
dropkicked him - right into an Expandable Worm Tower where he was overcome by voraciously hungry night crawlers.
Three down and three more still standing - Chuc wasted no time. Using his wit and no-holds bar technique, he grabbed two of the Season 6 villains by their ankles and swung them into his poison ivy patch (poison ivy is irritating to us mere humans, but Chuck Norris uses it as a skin inhibitor for shaving). The last one refused to go down easy and came after him with a lawn sweeper. How foolish of you, thought Chuc
; you come to fight Walker, Texas Ranger and all you brought was a lawn sweeper?! Saving the best roundhouse kick for last, Chuc
sent him straight into an open co
st bin; of course, Chuc
had to dis
e of him in the garbage afterward because he was starting to make the co
st smell like rotten eggs (an example of what happens when you have too much moisture in your co
st).
With all six of the Season 6 villains properly dised of, Chuc
was able to continue watering his roses and pansies and in peace - until the hiatus is lifted, of course.